The question was whether Biden’s actions warranted criminal charges. Well, no one really thought that Biden’s own Justice Department would hold him accountable, and Hur writes, “the evidence does not establish Mr. Biden’s guilt beyond a shadow of a reasonable doubt.”

Among Hur’s reasons? “At trial, Mr. Biden would likely present himself to a jury, as he did during our interview of him, as a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory,” he writes. Biden, Hur claims, could not recall when he was vice president. And didn’t remember when his son died. That last bit enraged Biden, who lashed out at Hur in a rambling press conference after the release of the report. But it turns out Hur and his team didn’t bring his son’s death up during the investigation, Biden himself did. And now it appears that the White House tried to pressure the DOJ into making changes to the report before it was released. So much for an “independent” counsel.

The whole thing stinks to high heaven but it’s what we’ve all come to expect from that cesspool in Washington. The bottom line is that we have a president who is too feeble minded to stand trial for willfully retaining classified documents but nevertheless thinks he should be president again. (Side note: New Hampshire Democratic Party officials agree with him. Two weeks before his own DOJ questioned his mental competency, they actually wrote this guy in on the primary ballot, making them the ultimate butt of this national joke!)

So, who will the Democrats turn to? They can’t very well have an “elderly man with a poor memory” babbling and pratfalling his way to the November election.

The obvious choice is Kamala Harris. In a Democratic Party that prizes diversity, equity, and inclusion over competence, the fact that the nation’s first Black female vice president is totally and obviously in over her head isn’t really a drawback. But the fact that she is unlikable and has a grating personality is.

I imagine most Democrats would take Biden’s clearly fabricated stories that go on and on (he repeatedly claims to have driven an 18-wheeler, for example, and don’t get him started on Corn Pop) over Harris’s cringy cackle laughing at weird, inappropriate moments. Besides, she’s even less popular than Biden, so don’t look for her to come to the rescue.

Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer is the prospect most Democrats would love to see at the top of the ticket. She has turned a big industrial state from purple to deep blue, has good (though not great) approval numbers, and has several progressive legislative victories under her belt. But are the Democrats going to pass over a Black woman for a White woman? No, of course not. Their coalition would be shattered.

The same applies doubly for California Governor Gavin Newsom, who has essentially been running for president all along, and just waiting for Biden to slip on a banana peel. The guy is everywhere. And he’s super liberal. But let’s be honest. Joe Biden is the last straight White male Democratic nominee for president. Period.

That brings us to former first lady Michelle Obama. Not only could she hold the Democratic coalition together, but she would also probably win the presidency in a landslide. She is universally loved in Democratic circles, admired and liked by most regular people, and much of the conservative disdain for her is based on apocryphal internet rumors that don’t amount to real vulnerabilities.

So, Michelle it is? Well, no. You see, Biden wants to be president again. And he’s not stepping down or moving aside willingly. Replacing him at the Democratic National Convention would require a well-organized coup and would engender more ill-will, not unite the party.

Turns out the Democrats are stuck with an elderly man with a poor memory.